I miss my husband

I miss my husband. He is sleeping only a room away but I cannot go to him. We have a newborn who has had a long, fussy day and will not sleep without me. My husband has to go to work far too early in the morning and I don't want the baby to disturb his sleep.

My husband and I have barely touched, barely spoken all day. I have spent most of the day feeding and comforting our child. My husband spent much of the day doing "my" chores. He is a grown man who can take care of himself completely but I don't like it when he has to - it is my job to take care of him.

I miss my husband's touch. I miss sleeping together in our bed. I miss being able to touch him whenever I want. I miss cuddling. I miss having the same schedule.

Tonight I broke down after watching my husband go to bed without me - it was too much. Once he turned off the bedroom light all I could think about was how much I ached to be with him. How much I want to sleep in our bed instead of on the living room furniture. How much I miss the cute little scratching on my back when he turns toward me while he's just barely awake. How much I miss the quiet safety of our bedtime chats in the dark. How much I miss feeling connected to him.

I miss my husband.
I feel alone.